


in another life (i would make you stay)

by mozartsounds



Category: Star vs. The Forces Of Evil
Genre: Angst, Heartbreak, Pregnant, Sad, everyone is sad, i'm gonna write something happy after this, pregnant star, wanting is different from needing, why do i write Sad stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-08
Updated: 2017-12-08
Packaged: 2019-02-12 00:11:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12947064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mozartsounds/pseuds/mozartsounds
Summary: Dimensions apart will not suffice for Star Butterfly, and a spot on the Butterfly throne will not be for Marco. They both want things the other doesn't want and maybe this is the end of it all.





	in another life (i would make you stay)

"You came."

She holds her wand in her hands, clutches it tight and inhales the scent of air in the wind. It smells like strawberries and roses, it smells like spring. She should adore the smell but she hates it now, right now should not smell lovely.

"I did."

He whispers, gives her an awkward smile and outstretches his arms, probably expecting a hug but she lifts a hand right before he can touch her, because she knows if he did touch her she'd melt and forget it all.

So she doesn't let him when he stops in front of her and she looks him in the eyes.

"Hello, Marco. We need to talk."

There is a cough after that, a blushing of cheeks a hand of his that reaches to scratch the stubble underneath his chin. He's so much buffer than the last time she saw him. He should be studying to a be a psychologist, not an athlete. She wonders why he has time for that but not for her.

"Well yeah, clearly. Where's my welcome back hug?"

He awkwardly laughs now with a hint (a lot) of bitterness laced in between the words. She holds on tighter to the wand, fluffs out her dress and is glad she wore a more wider gown today to cover the bump on her stomach. She's really gotten huge in the past three months.

"You're not getting one. Where's my 'week long' visit? Or my weekend visits?" She hisses it out almost, and it hurts her to see him flinch at that, but she still stands her ground when he burrows his eyebrows in frustration. "Star you know I'm busy and I couldn't make it-"

"You can't make it to anything anymore. You barely even made it here and I know this is your last day on spring break."

She doesn't even try to be vicious anymore, she sighs out the words and lets her hands fall to her side, lets the breath shake in her throat until she exhales. "Star-" He starts but she cuts him off again with a weak glare. She still had some control on him, not that it was needed but at least she had something on him, whether that was bad or good.

"Marco, listen, I haven't properly seen you since Stump Day. That's been four months."

She deadpans, lets herself twirl her wand in her fingers, resists the urge to chew on her hair or on her wand. But she shouldn't, she's 24 now and that's embarrassing. She can't even trust herself to melt in front of him like that. When he doesn't say anything she continues.

"Marco, don't you want to be with me?"

She chokes out, but she doesn't cry, no she won't let herself be vulnerable. "Star, of course I do, I love you!" He proclaims, lunges forward to place his hands on her shoulders, and she lets herself look at him, lets herself swim in his brown eyes for a flittering moment until she turns away, because it's all a lie.

"Then come here and live with me. Don't just be my squire, be my knight and be mine."

The words come breathlessly from her lips, and she rests her hands on her stomach subtly, because she wants him, she doesn't want him to stay away forever when there is a child growing inside her. She wants him to truthfully be there, because she loves him, more than she'd like to admit. But when he walks backwards with those doubting brown eyes, she knows he doesn't want her enough.

"You know it's not that easy."

The words shake from his lips, and he knows he's screwed up and she knows it's the end with that sentence alone. "But aren't I enough? Nothing is easy in life but don't you want to be with me forever? I can't wait months for just a day with my supposed lover again." She argues, cheeks flushing red and doing her best not to cry, and she hurts, because he doesn't even try to care, he doesn't try at all.

"If we could just wait a little longer to work this out-"

And thats where she stops it, stamps her foot on the ground with tears in her eyes because it's over, she knows it already. With just the look of uncertainty in his eyes and the doubt she knows that he'll never truly want her, he'll always doubt where their relationship stands and she'll always want something more.

"You said you needed space so we could both work our goals out. You've been dimensions away for 6 years now, and you're still unsure. I’m starting to think that entire dimensions and universes apart wouldn’t be enough space for you."

"Star listen-"

"No, Marco. I don't want to hear it unless you want to be with me. If you really want me you'll say yes to me and you'll stay."

She whispers it now, doesn't let the tears fall yet while they do water heavily, lets the gut in her stomach consume her and ignores the kicks against her stomach. And she awaits his answer, hoping for a split second he's changed his mind and  he'll want to stay, for both her and then eventually finding out to stay for their future daughter. (she doesn't need an ultrasound to know it's a girl)

But he doesn't.

"I-I'm not ready to be a knight-I'm not ready to be-"

He mumbles, flushes red and his eyes don't meet hers, and she finally knows know he never will be hers.

" _You're not ready to be mine."_

She finally chokes, finally lets the tears fall and he knows it's over too, she sees the way he sees her cry and it breaks her that he doesn't move, that all he can do is watch. He doesn't love her, at least not enough to be a part of her world, and that's what hurts the most she thinks.

"It's not that I don't-"

"Stop, talking, you-just leave. _And never come back_."

She stops him midway, and he looks at her. Stares into her eyes and she is a wreck, because he doesn't look distraught at all, he is just a red-faced who's hands shake, and she feels 14 again, like when she confessed her feelings and he didn't back, the beginning of such a treacherous point in life where they were both in love but didn't know how to say it. Now it seems like it again, the only difference is that, he doesn't want her.

He doesn't love her.

And he fumbles in his pocket and pulls out scissors, cuts a seam in the air and a blue portal opens, a portal to a dimension he loves more than her.

"I love you, you know that right?"

No she doesn't she thinks, because if he did he would want to be here, he wouldn't leave. He'd fight for her like he did in their younger days, the days he was hers and moved dimensions for her. That obviously wasn't the case anymore.

"I don't."

She responds with her crooked heart and voice, lets herself cry when he finally leaves without a last glance or word, lets herself sob as she holds her cheek with one hand, the other hand rested on her stomach with her wand in hand, and she cries more at that. That her child will grow without a father, that Star is without someone to love her. She feels like her grandmother Comet, the one that fell to the hands of a monster Star almost fell to, a woman with a loveless life and a wild daughter who grew to be hollow like the body that was Comet's in a grave. She hopes her daughter isn't like that.

_"I love you."_

Star whispers into the air, rests her wand on her growing belly and glides her hands over the gown that covers the belly that holds her daughter, holds the next heir of the Butterfly throne and the daughter of Marco Diaz and her. She doesn't really know who she's saying it to, maybe both.

But she wipes the tears away with a spell and carries on, because she has a daughter to look after. Not a broken heart.

But it still hurts like the kick against her stomach, it still hurts like the ten years of love that was thrown away.

**Author's Note:**

> Based of a set of Tumblr prompts: http://wordsnstuff.tumblr.com/post/162828495200/angst-prompts  
> Sorry if this is shitty, it's not my best but it's something I guess. :')


End file.
